No Regrets

I have worked many years in health care. As a home health nurse, I would sit and visit with many of my patients. It was so sad to hear so many of them talk about their regrets in life. Many of those that had lost their spouse would say, "I should have told her that she was beautiful more and that I truly loved them" or that they should have said yes to this or that. It was so hard and the men seemed to feel more quilt.

Last night, I told Phillip that no matter what happens to me, I have no regrets and that I could not be a happier wife and mother. He has treated me like the princess my dad would have wanted for his daughter. I feel cherished and loved unconditionally.

It is so hard for me to be 'taken care of' by him. He looks out for me in ways that I am not even looking for. When we went to San Antonio we went to the River Walk. He wouldn't let me walk by the river and he held onto me the whole time. The only reason I even knew was because I was walking by the river for a second and he said," You don't need to walk there". I was like, "oh". Yesterday while walking up stadium steps, I got dizzy because you look up and down and that really makes me sick, so he grabs my arm like they do the little old ladies. He is my protector and I am thankful but feel so bad that he has to do that at such a young age. I just don't like it one bit, but not liking my situation, doesn't change anything so I might as well accept it.

I am continually reminded that I need to look to God. He is in control. He knows my frustrations and fears. He knows that I want to make sure Phillip knows how to put up a pony-tail and braid just in case I am not there to do it. I want them all prepared. I know that I my children don't necessarily need me, but I want to be there to raise them. I know God would take care of my family and there is peace in that but I talk to Him a lot about my desire to raise my children and grow old with my husband. Of course He knows and it is amazing what a friend He has become.

God is good...All the time!